Reflective Essay

               When coming into Hamline University I had no real idea what I wanted to actually accomplish in my time here. It was only due to my privilege that I could pursue such a monumental project with no intentions in mind. In realizing my position, however, I was able to develop personally and come to see my role as a scholar of social justice and sociological issues. The only concrete Idea that I had in my head at the beginning of freshman year was that I wanted to pursue social sciences, no to change the world, but instead because it was something that I considered to be an easy option. This was how I viewed everything at the time, it only mattered that I could do everything with as little effort as possible. As I began taking more in-depth courses about the lived experiences of oppressed people, I started to see these studies a little differently. I was faced with the idea that I was not, in fact, the paragon of progressive virtues and ethics. I would need to work and struggle for the rest of my life to really be the best image of myself, and this meant a person devoted to understanding and subverting the systems and patterns that produce injustice in the world.

               I didn’t formally begin my way down an explicit social justice path until the end of my sophomore year. Before then I had been exposed to a culture that was hostile to the very concept of “social justice”, and the last thing that I wanted to be considered as a social justice “warrior”. As I grew, learned, and distanced myself from the world of teenage internet culture, I was able to contextualize what social justice meant. I learned that social justice wasn’t just a bunch of crazed hyper liberals making ridiculous demands; instead, social justice represented people fighting for basic rights and understanding in a society that deemed their humanity to be an unnecessary expenditure. I saw the need for people striving for the greater good of society and not just special interest groups advocating for their own causes; further, I understood that I could be a help to these causes. Without a sense of or even a need to be a savior, I decided that I could make the most impact by devoting my time and energy to fostering compassion and understanding in a world dominated by ignorance and hatred.

               My decision to pursue social justice was a radically different task than understanding how or what it meant to pursue such things. The latter is something that I will need to continually reevaluate throughout my life. Before my decision to be a social justice student I had taken classes concerning race, gender, and sexuality, and not being someone who had experienced any sort of oppression in these areas I did not want to “pick” where I wanted to devote most of my attention. I understand now that this was not the point, that I must necessarily have a firm grasp on all areas of oppression if I were to have a legitimate understanding of social justice as a whole. This realization, coupled with my sociological background, led me to my concentration; “Intersecting Systems of Power”. While I have shifted to a slightly more race-informed focus on social justice, I will never forget what I learned from my gender and sexuality studies and am always trying to keep as many perspectives in mind as possible when doing my work.

               As I write this in the last few weeks of my undergraduate experience I need to step back and reflect on areas that I can improve after graduation. I was shown time after time that my capacity for the intellectual side of social justice is rather robust, but it has become evident during my time in internship and applied classroom setting that I need to cultivate my ability to plan and react in real time. I can find strength in my ability for interpersonal communication, and I aspire to develop and deepen my group facilitation skills while also drawing upon my deep command of social justice knowledge. This is where I really see my opportunities for growth and where my excitement lies for the future. I aim to be pushed out of my comfort zone and faced with real challenges that cannot simply be solved with a research paper and one hour of heated discussion. I know that I will find a space for myself, especially when I am in a setting that both pushes and supports me in a new way, I just need to see exactly what is possible first.